Just to Clarify

So I've been getting a lot of phone calls from people I haven't heard from in a long time. They say they called just to say hello, but eventually they all get around to saying the same thing: "so I read your blog the other day, and..." So I thought I should clarify a few things. -when I wrote this post, I was in what is quite possibly the Worst Funk I've Ever Been In. Some people think it wasn't the best idea for me to publicly share what was in that post. I have no regrets, but I did want to share the context: I was feeling overwhelmed and under-equipped. I don't feel like that on a regular basis. Several things in my life converged simultaneously, and the stress got the better of me. I think my anxiety over Jack's migraines was a huge factor. That post was not representative of how I feel about my life as a whole, it was representative of how I felt about things on that particular day. It was my Emotional Self speaking, not my Reasoning Self. I knew, even as I wrote that post, that I would eventually get to a different place, but I wasn't there yet. -Aaron and I fight, I just don't usually post details about it on my blog. We are amazingly civil when we fight. This is mostly because of Aaron, who never raises his voice even a little. We have been married for five years and have never once yelled at each other or called the other person names. We try to focus on the issue at hand, and for the most part we succeed in avoiding any kind of attack on the person. Maybe I shared things that some people thought were Too Much Information, but I still don't regret it. The fight happened whether I publicized it or not(plus I did leave out some juicy bits). The reason why I chose to share my Funk was twofold: catharsis was a selfish reason; community was the other. I think community is the saving grace of motherhood. Without it I would be lonely and crazy. I can't count the number times another mom has shared with me about difficulties and challenges and I have found myself nodding in agreement and resonating with sympathy. It's important to know that it's hard for everyone, not just you. -Just because my children drive me nuts sometimes doesn't mean I don't love them. I love my children more than my own life. They also drive me nuts a good deal of the time. Those two things are not mutually exclusive. I think it is also important- crucial even- for other mothers to know this. It's par for the course. They are both my greatest source of joy and my greatest source of frustation. I don't tell them that they frustrate me(though I'm sure they can tell), I tell them they are my treasures. In the end, treasure is more important. -Everything I write on my blog is true. The wedding cake, the poop, the messy house, the organic garden, the romantic dates with my husband, the art projects, the flooded basement; in short, the Good, the Bad and the Funky. It's all my life. I know some people use their blog as a place to focus on the positive, and for the most part that's what I like to do. But that's not all there is, and I find it frustrating when people say things like "Children are such a blessing," without balancing that statement with the crustier realities of parenting. I certainly don't want to focus on the hard parts, but I think it's crazy-making to act like they aren't there. Children are a blessing. A blessing that will make you laugh, cry, gag, rejoice, despair and hope, sometimes in the span of fifteen minutes. Also, they will poop and throw up a lot. It is 11:20 and I am still in my pajamas. I'm going to change into some real clothes, put some banana bread in the oven, then go shampoo the rug downstairs which has developed a strong moldy odor since the Flood. We'll let the chickens out and probably do some gardening. At some point there will be some book reading on a blanket outside. Along the way there will certainly be some naughtiness, some fighting, some discipline and some hugging. In short, there will be real life.